Grasping for Hope Colored Threads
by AkumaStrife
Summary: Because Demyx wants to love him; even if Axel is too consumed by a memory to notice. /50 Sentences/


**Another one of these lists! I like these, so I'm sorry if you're getting tired of them =P I also love Axel/Demyx. Very Much. I don't prefer AkuRoku at all, and I'll even go so far as to say that it's probably _because_ I found this pairing. I don't know why it isn't that popular. **

**Anyways~ this is another tangle of AU and Canon(can you call this canon? I don't really think so, so we'll just call it "Game Universe" instead). I hope you enjoy ^_^ and as always I'd be thrilled to receive your reviews and hear what you all think.**

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**1. Peanut Butter and Jelly **

Demyx likes PB&J sandwiches best because that's what Axel would always make for him(ignoring the fact that that was the _only_ thing Axel could make with out burning); and it is for that same reason that the musician can't bare to eat another one ever again after the pyro leaves.

**2. Work**

"Come on my mission with me," Axel suggests, "and then after we can eat sea-salt ice cream on the clock tower"; and Demyx nods, pretending like he doesn't know that's Axel's tradition with Roxas.

**3. Lie **

"Tell me you want me; that you need me more than him!" Demyx screams, and Axel does -even if it's a lie- because their entire existence is a lie…one more couldn't hurt.

**4. Broke **

For once Axel is glad that they are beings without hearts and emotions; else he'd be completely broken, and he would've broken Demyx long ago.

**5. Apology **

Axel doesn't say he's sorry, because he's not; he's not sorry because he can't be; he can't be sorry because he doesn't have a heart to feel sorry with; and with this knowledge they've only talked themselves in circles and Demyx still winds up hurt, except he's not because he can't actually feel hurt because he doesn't have a heart….

**6. One **

The first day that he's gone Axel pretends like everything is normal, the second day goes much the same, the third he starts to worry, the fourth he inquires around, the fifth finds him roaming the darkened streets; it takes him 67 days to realize that Roxas is not coming back, 68 days to notice that Demyx has been there beside him since even before day one.

**7. Pinch**

"Would you stop that?" Demyx shouts as he bats Axel's hand away, but Axel doesn't listen as he pinches Demyx's arm when he sees him again…to make sure he's real and hasn't left him too.

**8. Reluctance **

Demyx hesitates because he has a feeling that if they do this while Axel is drunk, then when they wake up Axel will remember the event a little differently, more specifically in the aspect of _who _he did it with.

**9. Name **

Demyx has resigned himself to the fact that, when they are together, the name that leaves Axel's mouth won't always be his.

**10. Ease **

Slowly -ever so slowly- they ease Roxas back into their lives, because Axel is reckless and in his gluttony he very well may forget all about Demyx and what the musician did for him and what they mean to each other.

**11. Sky **

He's always thought that Roxas' eyes were the color of the sky, but now he notices that Demyx's are the color of the sea; and suddenly the impending decision is much bigger than Axel can handle, because now he's choosing a force of nature, a part of their world.

**12. Worse **

"Things could be worse," Demyx tries hopefully, but Axel snorts with little humor because, honestly, he can't think of anything worse than being an empty shell with out a heart nor emotions; and so Demyx gently reminds him, "Well, for one thing, I'm here with you."

**13. Blame **

Demyx is fed up with being a replacement, a substitute, and so can't help but venomously hiss, "Stop taking this out on me, it's not _my_ fault he left dammit! And it's not like you could've stopped him anyways!"

**14. Grasp**

Demyx feels like he's always chasing after Axel, always reaching for something he'll never have, but he shouldn't have expected anything more, because Axel is too busy chasing and reaching for a memory that already got what it was after; so in reality they were doomed from the get-go.

**15. Erase **

Demyx wants to rip all memories of Roxas from Axel's mind; and the worst part is that it wouldn't be that hard.

**16. Cramp**

"Ah, I've got a cramp in my shoulder," Axel moans in pain, but Demyx merely rolls his eyes and tightens the silk scarf before knotting it around the bedpost, "Shut up, I know you well enough to know when you're lying."

**17. Rave**

Demyx is livid with Axel for ditching him at the park yesterday, and becomes even more irate when the redhead has the audacity to _laugh_ at him because he apparently thinks he looks _cute_ all upset and fuming!

**18. Lecturing **

Demyx has always been the one nobody who never minded the bi-monthly meetings Xemnas held; after all, he got an entire day to stare at Axel and he wouldn't even be questioned about it.

**19. Day **

They are as different as night and day –even their elements can attest for that—but at least Demyx's element doesn't hurt Axel, not like Roxas' did.

**20. Alike **

Axel likes Demyx's blond hair and boyish face; he just wishes that his eyes were a little bluer.

**21. Temptation**

"Five minutes! I walk away for FIVE MINUTES and you're already tangled with some other boy!" Roxas screams, dragging his boyfriend out of the club, but Axel just smirks and doesn't say a thing; he's not sorry, it was the best five minutes of his life.

**22. Comic**

Demyx is shocked beyond words when he finds the rather explicit manga half hidden in Axel's dresser; not because of the content, but because the fact that the pyro owned the newest volume and didn't even think to let him borrow it!

**23. Jelly Bean **

It's not lost on Demyx how the pyro will wordlessly eat all the flavors he doesn't like.

**24. Jail **

A good friend will bail you out of jail, a best friend will be laughing in the cell with you, but a lover will hold you and keep all the other scary inmates away from your ass.

**25. Street **

"Did you ever watch Sesame Street as a kid?" Demyx asks on a whim (because he has a set list of bizarre questions he asks any new friends, and no one has passed his test) and Axel flaps a hand indifferently, "Nah, I was more into Fraggle Rock."; Demyx gapes and feels like his brain has just imploded because he's pretty sure he's just found his soul mate.

**26. Active **

"Demyx honey, I'm worried about you," the middle aged woman frowns, "We don't talk anymore. Are you doing well in school? Are you getting enough exercise?" and the blond boy in question can't help but laugh and toss his 'best friend' a look as he answers, "Yes mom, I'm _very_ active."

**27. Club**

Axel and Demyx are often found at that club located in downtown Hollow Bastion; because as they move against each other and the bass pulses in a frequency similar to a heartbeat, they can for a moment pretend they are alive and are capable of 'feeling' complete.

**28. Sensitive **

Demyx hates having to tiptoe around Axel when he's in one of his moods, both figuratively and literally (because apparently even the way he_ stands_ sometimes reminds the redhead of his missing Roxas).

**29. Transform**

"Shia LaBeouf is such a babe," Demyx mumbles through his mouthful of popcorn, "It's a shame he ends up with Megan Fox," and Axel's comment about him being a fruit is cut off as the pyro looks suddenly outraged, the next thing out of his mouth being, "That Bitch!"

**30. Shrimp **

Axel admits it's nice not having to bend in half to kiss his boyfriend.

**31. Honesty **

"I'm sorry," Axel whispers in the darkness, "I don't know if I'll ever get over him…" and Demyx sighs and runs his fingers through the red hair, "I know."

**32. Ice **

Axel decides he needs to rethink Demyx's innocence when the blond comes back from a food errand with ice cream toppings (no actual ice cream in sight) and condoms.

**33. Crash**

Demyx was always running into _something_, but it stopped being a bad thing during his freshman year of college, because apparently Axel was pretty good at catching things that were falling.

**34. Swallow **

Axel swallows thickly and pants a little as he watches Demyx, wondering whose bright idea it was to get popsicles (because he's not sure if he should congratulate who ever it was, or beat the shit out of him).

**35. Eight **

It's almost like they are kids again, chasing each other around with the garden hose and buckets of cold water, and they'll probably even end up in the bath together like they did all those years ago.

**36. Home**

They are nobodies, they don't have hearts, they don't feel, they don't make emotional attachments; so no where they end up will ever feel like 'home'…not even if the other resides there.

**37. Tourist **

Sometimes when they're bored and can't think of what to do on date night, Axel and Demyx will dress up like foreigners and pretend like every flower and bird is something to make a big deal about.

**38. Hook **

Axel hooks his thumbs through his belt loops and tugs down ever so slightly, if only to see Demyx's reaction (which ends up being to go down on him in the fitting room…the sales attendants are _not_ amused).

**39. Payment **

Demyx would give an arm and a leg for a heart; but he'd forfeit his life for Axel to have one, for Axel to have a second chance at _life_.

**40. Pants**

Demyx doesn't mind letting Axel 'wear the pants' in the relationship (even though they both prefer their relationship to have nothing to do with pants).

**41. Shove **

Axel learned a long time ago that, even if he was upset, he was to _never_ push Demyx.

**42. Sender**

Axel is pissed beyond words when Demyx receives a love letter from a sender that he doesn't recognize, and it takes an entire week of blow-ups and misunderstandings before the mailman apologizes for getting the addresses mixed up.

**43. Cattle **

"Stop looking at me like I'm some piece of beef…" Demyx mumbles in embarrassment, tugging at his outfit, and Axel makes sure to thoroughly 'brand' him so that the 'other cowboys don't try to round up what's mine.'

**44. Burn **

There's a charred outline of Axel's hand on Demyx's hip, but the musician doesn't pay any attention to it; after all, he's had worse.

**45. Smart**

Demyx may not have been the brightest of the organization, but at least he didn't have to try to prove his intelligence to everyone by spelling _everything_, because really, that's just childish.

**46. Island **

"I want to have an island named after me," Axel says out of the blue one day, and Demyx rolls his eyes and tells him to be prepared to wait for a volcano to blow; Axel's only response is to turn up his nose and spit, "Well the kids from the magic school bus did it."

**47. Professional **

What they're doing isn't very professional, but Axel doesn't give a shit and the pay here is crappy anyways.

**48. Title **

"I don't know what to name it!" Demyx whines as he stares at his term paper, but it promptly gets saved as 'akjshdfjksdfj' as that is exactly when Axel storms into the room and pushes him onto the bed.

**49. Pet **

"Why am I a cat in this?" Axel asks Demyx as they read a particular fanfic, and what they don't realize is that the author herself is wondering the same thing.

**50. Discipline **

Xemnas punishes Axel again for leaving the castle to search for Roxas, and Demyx is the only one who stays with him afterwards, patching up his wounds; but not even Axel realizes it, as he's too busy staring at the wall with glassy eyes and planning his next attempt.

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**So...Number 43...anyone want to draw me a Cowboy Axel? I'll even offer compensation(not money of course, but a story) =P**


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